9:36:03 am – Matthew Fox:
9:36:04 am – Federico Donner:
mentees, if you want to call it that, mentees, if you want to call it that. Um, if you want to call it that, um, that that I can walk with but but don’t push me too much.
9:36:12 am – Matteo Callegari:
now, what I, I usually do, we’ve
9:36:14 am – Matthew Fox:
9:36:16 am – Matteo Callegari:
mentees or the people that look for my support is. I tell them, You always like me, you never phoned me.
9:36:23 am – Matthew Fox:
9:36:24 am – Matteo Callegari:
Okay. It’s just right, me? and when I will be more than happy to help you, but I will do it on my my own time. And so I kind of a synchronic I think called asynchronic communication. It works much better with me because I’m more able to set the boundaries I need
9:36:45 am – Matthew Fox:
When Mateo going back a little bit because I want to shift to kind of talk about how we all have our individual styles and mentorship and how that can change. Sometimes you told that great story about you know, kind of you know where we’re Rodrigo just said, You know. Okay, here’s the microphone go. Um you know, I would think of that as kind of being learning to swim by being pushed into the deep end. And I know that’s a way that a lot of people would learn very well. I can also imagine that some people like I had experiences like that that helped me. I want to tell friends about that. They would say Oh that would make me quit judging right there. You know, I would just I would not respond Well to that. Um and I think there’s a lot of things like that. How I’m curious for you. How how do you kind of get a sense of what will work or will not work with different mentees and have you experiences where you have to think? Well, okay. I normally kind of mentor in this style, but for this person I need to do something a little bit different.
9:37:38 am – Matteo Callegari:
Yes, I I believe knowledge of as I said before, strengths and weaknesses both for the 19 and the mentors is very important because it helps to set the flow of the of the communication, the challenges that each one falls to be other. I, I had the same the same exact situation from the other side where I was the mentor and in that specific GP, it was in London. And we had, I was running this side events and we had like, Huge number of people that were completely unexpected that wanted to play that weekend. So all my judges that were judging events were expecting to have. I don’t know, 40 to 50 players but there were events up to 400 or 500 players instead. And I had this judge at level two judge that we have been discussing a lot about how to do things and I went to them and tell them that okay you know what your event that is starting in 10 minutes. Now has 300 players instead of a 60 we expected and you need to run the player meeting with the microphone because it’s impossible, otherwise to have all the players listen to you. Are you comfortable with that? And they told me, No, I’m not. Can someone someone else do it? Okay, So I didn’t thought them like, Okay, shut up, keep the microphone and do it, but we work together. So the We found the solution where they actually ran the player, meeting with the microphone and I just suggested them. Okay, don’t look at them, just turn to the judge station and behind the player making this way. Look at me instead of the 300 players and that’s what and they were able to actually do a good player meeting.
9:39:31 am – Imaj’in:
9:39:33 am – Matteo Callegari:
whether events started with the player that were excited about the event and excited to be playing and that’s why you need, yes.
9:39:40 am – Matthew Fox:
9:39:40 am – Matteo Callegari:
Yes Yes, you need to know each other in order to to find as a mentor to find the best way. Yes you need to know each other in order to find as a mentor to find the best way. So the the minty to succeed,
9:39:49 am – Matthew Fox:
9:39:50 am – Matteo Callegari:
And and that’s where you need to build things a little bit with knowledge of each other.
9:39:56 am – Matthew Fox:
I love that, you both.
9:39:56 am – Matteo Callegari:
To be honest and transparent with each other, of course.
9:39:59 am – Matthew Fox:
I love that both you asked, are they comfortable? And that they trusted you enough to say no, you know, because I think
9:40:04 am – Matteo Callegari:
9:40:05 am – Matthew Fox:
can be out there’s a lot of pressure there. What about from rest of you? How have you had experiences where kind of your meant? You realize that the person you’re mentoring, maybe needed a different style of mentorship than than what you might have otherwise done.
9:40:20 am – Felix Capule:
I think my experience is more so now, because of When we’re doing events, you don’t need to remind the the mentee, as to, you know, what needs to be done. Right now, we’re just asking them to go through the modules and when they have the luxury of time to do it whenever they can because the same as before. You can do it whenever they can, they can study whenever they can. But when you are voting an event, you know, you can guide them along the way they can observe you as what the least said or here in the Philippines. For college shadowing that we shadow the person and vice versa.
9:40:57 am – Matthew Fox:
9:40:57 am – Felix Capule:
Now. Right. Now, the difference is that, you know, we We remind them that you have a module that needs to be that. How’s your progress on this? You have questions about it. It’s not really Reminding them to go through the modules. Now, it’s reminding them but you really want to still do this, I mean what’s your commitment on this? So that’s my take on that. That’s how different it is for me
9:41:18 am – Matthew Fox:
9:41:23 am – Felix Capule:
right now. But as far as have I experience, you know, That I I thought that I’m the wrong mentor for the prisoners or should I do a different approach? Fortunately, I haven’t. But I’m sure in the future, I will be in. Once I do, I’ll reach out to Mateo and ask him what to do about it.
9:41:43 am – Matthew Fox:
9:41:46 am – Felix Capule:
But they was in the first GP that I was at when I was a level one few years ago. So
9:41:51 am – Matthew Fox:
I was wonderful.
9:41:53 am – Felix Capule:
9:41:54 am – Matteo Callegari:
It was an amazing GP. It was my first experience in the Philippines and was beautiful.
9:42:01 am – Matthew Fox:
9:42:01 am – Federico Donner:
I don’t know that much about mentorship styles because I don’t think I can really effectively change my mentorship style but I think something I’m that material mentioned is on changing what you focus on because like I have a level one in my
9:42:14 am – Matthew Fox:
9:42:16 am – Federico Donner:
community right now that is absolutely ready to step level 2 and my mentorship is maybe giving him confidence in actually doing it and
9:42:27 am – Matthew Fox:
9:42:28 am – Federico Donner:
Um, and he doesn’t need rules help. He doesn’t need operations. Oh, he’s good at those, but he maybe need some self-confidence. So, um, Maybe focusing on identifying what the mentee needs and focusing on that is important. Not that much changing the style. I think that can be hard and maybe forcing it would be even worse, I think.
9:42:50 am – Matthew Fox:
9:42:57 am – Imaj’in:
9:42:58 am – Matthew Fox:
Go ahead at least.
9:43:00 am – Imaj’in:
Yeah. About about that. It’s Very personal. But I I think that. I always chose to mentor or not. Someone else. depending of What I, what was my feeling? About the relation between the person and myself. And for example, what is was very important for for me, it was Am I fine with this person? Do I feel well with this person, I think it’s was very, very important for me to to feel perfectly fine. Also, because I knew that by
9:43:53 am – Matthew Fox:
9:43:54 am – Imaj’in:
mentoring, this person, the relationship between me and, and And then we’ll be very will be particular, will be strong. And I have a responsibility for the for this person, but I also want to learn myself from this person. If I have the feeling that I will not be capable to practice. Also, myself through the work, I will do with this person. I will not feel completely fine and it will be the moment that I will propose to the person to meet someone else. I have some examples about that. for example, when I when I started judging, and from this moment to until now basically, I always used judging aspects to improve the self-confidence for me, because I had some difficulties about that. And that’s it, that is why I found a particular pleasure to help. Some other teachers who had the same difficulty as me because by working with them on this kind of difficulty, I work also on my own difficulty with that and it was it was very interesting for me to to do that. And for example, when I When I met some judges. Who do not had a lot at all, a deal difficulty with their own self-confidence. It was they were very self-confident and there were they have a very strong character or something like that. I did not. Consider myself capable to bring them. A very useful thing. As a
9:46:01 am – Matthew Fox:
9:46:03 am – Imaj’in:
So I preferred to let them working with some of the different people. But I helped a lot of pages. I, I did my best to, to help a lot of teachers that had a strong or not lack of self-confidence, because As I told you about by working with them, I was working on me. And for me, it was very, very important to consider this by when I chose to work or not with a person as a mentor, or as a mentee. Also,
9:46:44 am – Matteo Callegari:
If I cannot it up. I I totally agree with all this because also, my my favorite relationship mentor to mentees. When I’m kind of in difficulty at what the mentee wants to achieve. So that because that pushes me to
9:46:57 am – Matthew Fox:
9:46:59 am – Matteo Callegari:
find also ways to improve myself and and I I love it. This equation much more. When I’m like, I feel super confident in. What they ask me. That’s kind of too easy. I don’t know how to say whenever I
9:47:12 am – Matthew Fox:
9:47:14 am – Matteo Callegari:
have to to gain like myself, something from the relationship, like we win situations and just On one side.
9:47:23 am – Matthew Fox:
I want to say something about that in a moment, let me quickly say to those, in our audience, We’re about 15 minutes away from the end and so there’s a great time if you all have questions or comments or want to say something. You’re yourself about mentorship, please jump in, we’ve got a four, great great panelists here and who would love to take your questions. I mean, yeah, I think that’s a, that’s such a great point. I know what when I was being mentored to L2, I thought so, in the moments, where my mint, I had number one of people, but Jacob Leecheets especially was the one who really I sometimes joked that he kind of dragged me, kicking and screaming to L2 because I, I wanted it for sure, but I did not believe I could be and he did such a great job with confidence. But some of my favorite moments were, when I would ask him a question that he had never thought of and his response would be. I don’t know. Let’s look that up together. And so we were together kind of go through the process of finding it in the CR or talking through what this would work or, or sometimes he would like, just open, you know, the, the two of us would walk over to to someone else you and say, Hey, my mentee had this question and I thought that was such a great thing of of him being able to both, you know, show what he didn’t know. But also, to kind of talk of how as mentors we can learn with our mentees.
9:48:38 am – Matteo Callegari:
9:48:39 am – Matthew Fox:
So, it’s powerful. He asked, Um, for each of you, we’ve
9:48:43 am – Imaj’in:
9:48:44 am – Matthew Fox:
kind of talked about this idea of mentorship style Maybe that’s not the right word but I’m wondering are there things you think that you do as a mentor that that maybe not everybody else does that? That could Felix, you kind of talked about how sometimes we get the sense in the judge world of like, there’s one right way to do things, you know and my colleague Jonah would tell me that. There’s only one way to do a tape loop and I would agree that maybe but there was a lot of things, you know, I might be a different mentor than you and and someone else and that’s okay, for each of you. How do you kind of feel like your mentorship style is maybe a little unique or different than than others you’ve met?
9:49:21 am – Imaj’in:
About about me. I It’s a very difficult question, very interesting, but very difficult because I think the best person who Who existed to speak about your own way to do mentorship other mantis and not not myself. Especially because men some mentors may try may have tried a lot of different mentor. Before to, to find me before to, to try me and So, if I consider the opinions of the other people around me, what I heard about a lot about myself, is the fact that I was listening a lot, the people and I was and I worked a lot with them, especially soft skills. And I know that some people. preferred to work with me because they had the feeling that they They could speak a lot about themselves about what the the feeling are about judging or the Dutch program or a kind of specific event. I have only this feedbacks about my way to, to Montour people. I know that I love to listen, people talking about their feelings that I
9:51:02 am – Matthew Fox:
9:51:03 am – Imaj’in:
think it’s very, it’s one of the most interesting aspect of mentorship in judging. I love to learn about some of the people, their own way to observe or to, to live an event to life and even sorry. So, so I know that I I listen a lot, and I took a lot with people about their soft skill and about how to use judging To grow up or to increase themselves as a person in the rest of their life. Because I know that I used dredging myself to do that judging a learned me learned me a lot about myself also as a person, for example, I, I can share with you. An important perspective that is the fact that I discovered myself as a woman. Because of the of judging. And the, the first community, I met that took to me about gender, aspects are about the fact that I, I may consider. I may have the identity of a woman. Was churches. So worth it is.
9:52:26 am – Matthew Fox:
9:52:27 am – Imaj’in:
So it was very strong for me.
9:52:34 am – Matthew Fox:
I think a little bit touched
9:52:34 am – Matteo Callegari:
9:52:35 am – Felix Capule:
9:52:36 am – Matthew Fox:
But did you? But that’s a beautiful story at how
9:52:36 am – Felix Capule:
9:52:37 am – Matthew Fox:
important Judge Community can be. So I Felix, go ahead.
9:52:41 am – Felix Capule:
No might take on that. I mean, in this on the surface, we’re doing the same thing with mentoring because we’re sharing experiences. Because of the events right now. So it’s really hard to say, You know, what makes you stand out? What makes you unique, what’s? What makes you different? But for me, I try to be as encouraging as I can because it’s not easy to be certified. I mean some states easy because it’s your hobby. it’s just a game and all that, but you know, The comprehensive was made of a lot of chapters and a lot of subject. So, you know, there’s a lot of letters to that, there’s a lot of, you know, pages to that. It’s not really that easy and I meant he would sometimes stop the process because they feel burdened about it, that they feel that it’s too much for them, or maybe they’re not too good for, they feel that way. And most often than that, we will all go through that. So, for me, what makes me a bit
9:53:38 am – Matthew Fox:
9:53:41 am – Felix Capule:
different? Like, I is, you know, I try to encourage them to push forward if they really want to and if they need any help from me I’ll try to do what I can to you know guide them and assist them, not to spoon feed them but to you know help them achieve what they want to achieve. Because you know that that’s the beauty of the judge program. We have people who have done this before us. And just the same, there would be new people that would come after us. So the mentoring part of it, would make sure that their sustainability and continuity to the program. Let’s make that.
9:54:21 am – Matthew Fox:
I I love that sustainability part, you know, because it’s that idea of, we’re not all probably gonna be want to be judges for all of our maybe we do, and that’s great too. But that, you know, those new people coming up.
9:54:32 am – Felix Capule:
9:54:34 am – Federico Donner:
Something you. You said that. I think it’s important is something you said that, I think it’s important is to try to leave the ego at the door when mentoring and, and understanding that the mentee can
9:54:43 am – Matthew Fox:
9:54:44 am – Federico Donner:
have better ideas better solutions for problems and things. We didn’t think of or we’re not good at. So I try to keep that in mind constantly and being able to say, I don’t know or or maybe, wow, you surprised me. This is great and not try to prove yourself all the time. Um, I think that that’s important.
9:55:07 am – Felix Capule:
And I believe that somehow humanizes
9:55:08 am – Matteo Callegari:
9:55:09 am – Felix Capule:
us to the metadise of the mentee because most often than not, when someone body is newer than us, they will think that we are always right? It’s not always the case, right?
9:55:17 am – Federico Donner:
9:55:19 am – Felix Capule:
We don’t always have to justify what we have said. We, we can always say that we, I don’t know that, you know, where
9:55:24 am – Matthew Fox:
9:55:24 am – Felix Capule:
humans, humans, you know, you’re not those that don’t pretend that, you know, everything. everything. So you just have to that you know you’re not those that don’t pretend that, you know, everything. So you just have to that the person
9:55:33 am – Matteo Callegari:
You know, one of the things I love to tell Mentees at a point is that Oh wait, you are making me useless. but that makes them so happy, but I much more happy than them because
9:55:44 am – Matthew Fox:
9:55:47 am – Matteo Callegari:
mean that means the the relationship is improving and that actually
9:55:51 am – Matthew Fox:
9:55:52 am – Matteo Callegari:
actually you are kind of surprised of what they are doing and they are doing well. So actually you are kind of surprised of what they are doing and they are doing well. So it’s a if you ever hear me saying that it means I, I love you and you’re doing great.
9:56:03 am – Matthew Fox:
Yeah, I I still remember one of my favorite one of the first moments that really helped my confidence was when I was on the floor of a main event. And a judge who had really nice official way but they’ve been someone of a mentor for me. They’ve helped me some especially at my first couple of events. They called me over to ask me a question. And I was used to them asking me a question as a way for them to test me. but so I gave them my answer and they went Okay good, I thought so but I wasn’t sure and then went to finish their ruling and I thought Oh, that that they weren’t asking me the mentor, They were asking me as an equal and that like we’re saying Mateo, was it just? I still remember how I felt, you know, Years later. It was such a like confirming moment. We’re almost at a time and and thank you all so much. This has been such a great conversation. I think people really gained so much from it. Um, so I just kind of last for each of you. What’s kind of your closing word, something you haven’t gotten to say about mentorship that you think is important and I’ll kind of going reverse order before. So at least, what would you say is kind of like a final word about mentorship from you?
9:57:05 am – Imaj’in:
9:57:06 am – Matthew Fox:
You sum up everything. You think in 30 seconds,
9:57:10 am – Imaj’in:
A. And I think it’s very important when you make mental ship to consider what mentorship can bring to yourself to. Not only for humanity, will you? Will you find with the mentorship is? A very important question because we are if you are not fine with your money or with mentorship in general, you, I think you will have a lot of difficulties to make a good work for the mentee or for yourself. So I think it’s very important to share the experience.
9:57:52 am – Matthew Fox:
9:58:20 am – Felix Capule:
About the rules or, you know what we can show them, or guide them or what you could learn or what so what you could teach them. But also, we could learn about the person and how to handle different person because every meant he would be different, just like exit, every. Each and every one of us is actually different
9:58:37 am – Matthew Fox:
9:58:41 am – Matteo Callegari:
I would say that if you want to become a mentor, you need one big thing inside of you and it’s it’s a big heart. because you should never enter into a
9:58:48 am – Matthew Fox:
9:58:51 am – Matteo Callegari:
relationship with m&t unless you really care for this person. And unless you you really want this person to achieve what they want to achieve or maybe even something more than what did they start with? So if you don’t find yourself in this position, if even if you have maybe the the knowledge or the time to enter the lake relationship, I strongly advise you to find somebody else. care about something
9:59:18 am – Matthew Fox:
9:59:19 am – Matteo Callegari:
about something is about something is difficult. Especially if you’re the if you have a responsibility of this kind of relationship,
9:59:26 am – Matthew Fox:
Yeah. I federico.
9:59:29 am – Federico Donner:
um, I’m gonna flip the script a little bit and just say that it’s not that you’re a mentee until you graduate to a mentor, you’re always both and so people that consider
9:59:37 am – Matthew Fox:
9:59:39 am – Federico Donner:
themselves mentees Maybe they have things to teach. So next time, there’s a judge conference coming your way. Maybe apply to presents there. I’m sure there’s things you can teach others and and
9:59:51 am – Matthew Fox:
9:59:52 am – Federico Donner:
9:59:53 am – Matthew Fox:
I I think it’s such a great way to put it ending. I mean, I remember a judge conference I went to where there was a very new L1 and who applied to present. And I think a couple of thought, like, What is this person going to talk about? And he realized they were a teacher, like, you Elise and they give us great talk about how to work with
10:00:08 am – Federico Donner:
10:00:08 am – Matthew Fox:
kids at, you know, events. And it was like, Oh so much. I’ve
10:00:11 am – Imaj’in:
10:00:11 am – Federico Donner:
10:00:12 am – Matthew Fox:
yeah. So, Well, thank you all so much. Um, it was really great having you on, I think it was really great that we all could do here these in perspectives because mentorship is not gonna be the same for everybody. And it’s something we’ve all had to kind of wrestle with during this online era and as as live events start to come back, hopefully, we’re gonna start to get those relationship building but we’re probably gonna continue, you know, I think we may have mentorship situations where one of us, you know, we travel a thousand miles, we meet someone. And then we go back to our own homes and they want to stay in contact and mentorship can look like that to those of you listening. Thank you so much for participating. Uh, we’re still kind of learning how these first week events can go. So if you’ve got thought, if this was really great if you have Things we could improve. Please let us know. You can email questions at Judge, Academy.com, or find me directly on discord, or at Matthew at georgiacademy.com. Oh, we’ve got two more great events coming up for the rest of this week, and of course, prerelease weekends coming up, are Daniel Lee. Just a great event yesterday that you can still find on the twitch site. But what to expect at a pre-release, if you’re either judging the first time, or maybe, you know, you just haven’t judged in two and a half years and you want to kind of kick the wheels a little bit, that’s a great help, there’ll be a pre-release kit coming out at the end of today or tomorrow. It’s a lot of great resources. So to all of you, thank you all so much and everyone knows thank you and have a good day.